Insults

I found this list of insults as I was housecleaning in my computer today (I do it periodically, because it makes my brain feel neater!) and laughed for about 5 minutes straight.  Then I read some to Jerry, still laughing so hard I could hardly get them all out.  Then I wanted to pin them onto my “Lite Side” pinterest board, but I don’t know where I found them, and thus don’t have an “online” source to pin from.

So, I’m posting them here for you all to enjoy and for me to pin!  I don’t know where they came from, and would love to give credit if I did…if you know, please send me the link!  I’m not sure about the truth of the statements (if Abraham Lincoln ACTUALLY said that) but I don’t really care, because…I’m too busy laughing!  The ones in bold are my faaaaaaavorites!

“He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.”

- Abraham Lincoln

 “Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.”

- Moses Hadas

 “I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”

- Groucho Marx

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”

- Oscar Wilde

“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”

- Stephen Bishop

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”

- John Bright

“He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.”

- Samuel Johnson

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”

- Paul Keating

“There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.”

- Jack E. Leonard

“He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.”

- Robert Redford

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”

- Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”

- Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”

- Oscar Wilde

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2 thoughts on “Insults

  1. http://seniorliving.about.com/od/agingwithattitude/a/insults.htm This one has a few more than you had… Found several other sites (I googled the first two insults with their owner) but no one else sited a source…

    “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde – a form of this one is posted in our optometrist’s office…

    Now – for my own thoughts… I have to wonder why you feel the need to have an arsenal of insults… hmmmmmmm….. lol

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